If I had to live my life over again I would............!

.......not do anything differently.

Well maybe I would tweak it a little bit. Erma Bomback once wrote an article of all the things she would do differently or in actuality what she would do. I thought about that. And I was reminded of this article because of a seminar I attended in May of 2007. I was reminded that I really do like my life and I wouldn't really make any radical change to my life. So here is what I did come up with.

I would not do anything diffently because I already reflect more. And I take the time to do it. I don't let things like my life pass with out giving it attention. I like examining and seeing what I can improve on. I like to let God flow into my heart and be the basic everything in my life. I like pondering on all the good things that God has done and what he will continue to do in my life. This way when the bad happens or circumstances happen, I have a foundation of a God who loves me so much. Philippians 4:8 says, "Finally, brethren, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy, meditate on these things." Think ON THESE THINGS. I have spent half of this year acknowledging the the things that are true about God and what He has done in my life. One thing I have learned is that I can't be strong in the Lord if I am always beating up on myself. God is amazingly the biggest factor in my life that I need to meditate and reflect more on.

Erma states she would take more risks, maybe clean less and use the fine china more. As far as taking risks, well I have taken some good and not so good risks. But one of the biggest risk is believing in God. Am I some weirdo that really believes in Loving God up in the Big Sky. Yeh I am. I will believe it again and again and again. His fingerprints are all over me.

Stepping out on faith and going on Missions Trips out of my control and comfort zones are risks, but good ones. Life changing ones. The ones when you come back and see what you have seen, you never forget. The ones that have caused me to live differently. That is risk.

Okay maybe I have taken some bad risks. Such as jumping off a cliff. What was I thinking? Well at least if I goofed and didn't land right, I would be in heaven with God. But Im sure that was not part of the plan. And by the way it really did hurt when I landed in the water tilted on my side a bit. It felt like a 2 by 4 hitting me real hard. Yikes.

Maybe the other risk that was kind of bad was scuba diving in St. Croix 1 day in a half before flying home. There was a fine line if that was safe to that so close to flying. But the real kicker was the waiver I signed that they would not be responsible if I get the bends and die, or if I get attacked by a shark. etc.

By far though for me have been those risks that I have taken for God. I would do it again in a heart beat. And really keeping a clean house and using the fine china are really insignificant when it comes to the fullness of life that I have in God.

Tony Compolo said that He would do more things that would live on after he is dead. Now that is legacy. That is destiny. I would love to have a legacy, things and relationships that live on after I die. In someways I get to see that now. I have been apart of a mission in Belize now for over 7 years and now I get to see the fruit of that. God is amazing and has done wonderful things. Such as in a place called the burial grounds in Belize City there is a school that kids get to go to that would have never ever went to school. I got to have a hand in getting that school up and running. Now thats what is important, making a difference in peoples lives. That is legacy. The other thing that always makes me excited is when through one of the Bible Studys I teach that some had made a better relationship with the Lord or a life transforming changes bringing them closer to the Lord. That is exciting.

Somewhere in scripture it states we are called to do good, because of our faith we are called to do good works, not to gain us salvation but out of our love for the Lord. That is what I will continue to do through the Lord. Will I do anything different? No Way!

Retrospect Revisited!!!!!

A review, survey, or contemplation of things in the past! That is the definition in noun form. Every once in awhile I revisit the past. Sometimes it's good, sometimes its bad. Sometimes it's something that I really want to write about, sometimes my pen has not even begun to or I wouldn't even dare. Sometimes I wish I could forget about it. So here I am being introspective about Retrospect. Here is my one time blog exposure to something of the past that should probably not be even remembered, or maybe even in these archives. Here goes:

The summer of 2007 should be titled "Upheaval at Best". Or maybe "August Uproot". So let's take August 2007 for instance. Life was going somewhat tra la la,la la and then UPHEAVAL. Many of my friends go through these upheavals, but at the time mine seemed like the worst. The thing is, I really don't have to go into details but just to honestly say my life changed completely in August of 2007. And I began slowly to unravel and fall apart. So Lori, give me some details. NOT, no details, ya just have to know it was painful and gut wrenching hard. Somewhere at the end of the year, I knew I had to choose to focus on God or wallow in self pity. Have you ever been in the dungeon of self-pity? How about it the prison of "WHY ME"? How about "Where are you LORD"?

How about "OH, Say it isn't true"? Or how about, "Not my daughter Or Not my Son"? Or how about, "I just can't do this anymore"? Or how about "I just want to go and crawl under a rock and hide for ever"?

Well anyway I'm being retrospective today and it's nice to be out of 2007. So what are somethings I did learn.

#1. God really is in Control

#2. I really am not in Control

#3. I am broken once again, and God has made me beautiful

#4. I can't fix things

#5 God does hold on, step in, intervene in HIS timing.

#6 And I love God more than anything else in my life.

#7 Things may not be a 100% perfect in my eyes but in God's timing and agenda He has a plan and I must wait

#8 Humpty Dumpty couldn't be put back together again, but the Lord has transformed me into something new again and again.

So I do know that our Lord is faithful. I am living proof of that. His promises always come true and He will get us through the UPHEAVALS in our life.