On Hold

It’s not too often in life that someone or something can put a hold on your life. I was thinking about being put on hold. Like on the telephone, not much you can do. You just have to wait. I can’t tell you how often I have just wanted to hang up. But you know the routine. If you hang up and call again you are back to being # 50 on that so called list.
So here I am, my life put on hold. But this time it’s not a person on the other line, it some diabolical sickness. I have no control. I just have to wait. And I can’t hang up, because even if I could do it, I would still have this diagnosis on my head.
So let’s backtrack, to the week before being put on hold. I’m busy doing my thing, started my diet, my workout tweak is in full swing, but by Tuesday, I’m feeling like crap. Thought maybe because it was from lack of stimulation so on Thursday of last week I take this 2 mile walk, but instead of feeling this energy burst like I usually get, I am beat and I need a nap.
So here I am sitting pathetically on my outside deck soaking in some rays, which by the way some how the sun went in, when I came out. At any rate my life now has been put on hold by someone, (the Doctor) and by something, (Pneumonia). The diagnosis is 14 days. So what is it like? It’s not like I chose to be on hold. So Lori, what is it like?
On hold,
Forced to be taken away from any adult socialization
On hold,
Mercifully at the hands of others for some help
On hold,
With my stack of good books that I have always wanted to read
On hold,
Watching the dishes and laundry pile up
On hold,
Watching the dust balls grow in the corners
On hold,
REM sleeping more that I can ever remember and actually finding out for the first time that I dream in color
On hold,
Missing my long morning and afternoon walks with my dog
On hold,
Almost finished now with eat, pray, love by Elizabeth Gilbert
On hold,
Just for now
On hold